Meanwhile this story writes itself: “Man-made climate change worse than thought, experts say.” Or, to fill in the details du jour, “Arctic Ocean acidification worse than previously expected” from the University of Bern. And of course the science is settled and all effects are bad. Hit print. Man, this game is easy.
The study in question, according to the Eurekalert! press release, finds that “The Arctic Ocean will take up more CO2 over the 21st century than predicted by most climate models.” And if we were journalists, and one of us is, we would ask how we know that’s a bad thing (we don’t) and how it’s possible continually to tell us the models have it right on climate change then tell us it’s way worse than the models say. (In the scandalized silence that followed, we’d ask why the models always seem to underestimate the danger in news stories though they always seem to overestimate it compared to the data.)
Never mind. “This additional CO2 causes a distinctly stronger ocean acidification.” (Um, aren’t the oceans mildly alkaline? Yes. But “acidification” sounds really bad, so use it.) Also “The ocean takes up large amounts of man-made CO2 from the atmosphere.” (Um, didn’t the alarmists say nature couldn’t absorb man-made CO2 which is why it’s accumulating in the atmosphere causing warming? Yes. That too.)
All impacts being bad, “Ocean acidification particularly impacts organisms that form calcium carbonate skeletons and shells, such as molluscs, sea urchins, starfish and corals.” Which doesn’t just say bye-bye Great Barrier Reef. It suggests they will stop sequestering carbon in the limestone that accumulates from their shells, so more CO2 means even more CO2 in a runaway warming effect. Except that such runaway effects haven’t been observed in the past when CO2 levels were far higher.
Never mind, the story practically writes itself. We… are… all… going… to… die.